Thursday, February 15, 2007

Homophobia Gone Mad

There’s not much I can add to what Tim Hardaway said about homosexuality (when asked about former NBA player John Amaechi coming out as a gay man in the NBA). It’s been argued and argued and there’s not much chance that people will change their stance on this issue. Of course what separates this from other conversations about homosexuality is that Hardaway used the word “hate”. “I hate homosexuals” he said. He went on to say that he would avoid a gay man if he were a teammate, especially in the locker room. To me, this sums up the whole issue. Most people who believe homosexuality is wrong will point to this very argument. “Would you want a gay man in YOUR locker room, staring at you while you get undressed?” I would venture to say that most guys who could care less about someone’s sexual preference would not want to share a public shower or locker room with someone who is gay. Fair enough.
(I must add that I’ve played pick up basketball on a regular basis with a former women’s D1 player and while she is very pretty, the attraction gets lost when she’s schooling me in the lane for rebounds or stealing the ball from me).
So to follow up with the next topic, many are asked what would happen if a CURRENT NBA player admitted he was gay. Would his teammates accept him? Would they treat him with any respect?
I have a different angle. I think a gay player COULD be successful, as long as he uses it to his advantage. Like or not (and I HATE it), trash talking is a part of today’s sports culture. And out on the court, NONE of those NBA players are quiet. Imagine how a player who is gay could get under the skin of an opponent. Basketball is a VERY physical sport – body checking, elbows flying, blocking out for rebounds. Would YOU be able to concentrate if a gay player was taunting you and making you uncomfortable?
“Tough shot, sexy”
“Ooooh, you sure missed that one, sweetie”
“Honey, if you can get by me, you can HAVE the basket, but I aint’ gonna make it easy”
“I’m taking this to the basket, if you want to touch me on the way, be my guest”
“If I score 20 points tonight can I call you my bitch?”
The testosterone that it takes to play pro sports is high volume. It’s doubtful that comments like these wouldn’t make a macho player’s skin crawl, thus throwing off his game. In fact, chances are that it would make most guys go crazy and draw a few technical fouls. And of course, two of those and you’re out of the game. Football, baseball, this principle could apply in any sport.
There is the argument that teammates of a gay player would be really uncomfortable with that kind of talk. Please. Did Terrell Owens’ teammates put up with him as long as he was scoring touchdowns? Did the Atlanta Braves deal with John Rocker when he was saving all those games? Barry Bonds? Dennis Rodman? The answer is yes. I’m not saying that Joe Macho wouldn’t have some reservations about sharing a locker space with a gay teammate. But most heterosexual men make the mistake of assuming that all gay men are checking them out. Stop flattering yourself. I just don’t think that’s true. I don’t think that homosexual men are any more ‘sex hungry’ than heteros. The notion that a gay man in a locker room is a kid in a candy store who doesn’t know where to begin is ludicrous.
The simple fact is that homosexuality is here to stay. I truly believe that people are born gay. That seems to be the main sticking point in whether or not someone accepts homosexuality. But remember this, if it DOES bother you that someone is gay, or wants to have a gay relationship (or get married), chances are that you think of them as a gay first. Just as many still think of some people as black first. It’s the first thing you think about when you deal with them. And you already have all of your preconceived notions up and running that could get in the way of your relationship with them. Notions that they could, in fact, use against you.
Are you a cynic? Then think of it the way Dennis Miller did. “Why despise someone on the basis of color or sexual orientation when, if you take the time to get to know them, you can find SO many other reasons to hate them?”

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