I Don’t Make Predictions Week 7

Everybody spent all week arguing as to whether or not South Florida was worthy of being #2 in the BCS. It’s all wasted words. These things work themselves out – they always do.
Let’s move on to the games of note:
(I should point out that Georgia is off this week, so I will spend Saturday actually doing something constructive – painting shudders and looking for a pin-hole leak in a swimming pool liner. I know – you wish you were me.)
Under the ‘games that could get ugly’:
#23 Cinciannati @ Pittsburgh – Pittsburgh has been beaten up pretty well this season, and that includes their coach.
Northern Illinois @ Wisconsin – the Badgers have lost two in a row after starting out the year 5-0. How mad are they? Tune in and see.
#4 Oklahoma @ Iowa State – Let’s see, how can we will our way back into the BCS title game (since South Florida lost)? Bitch slap an inferior opponent and show the world how COOL we really are!!
#13 USC @ Notre Dame – Remember the good ole days (2 years ago) when this game meant something? The Trojans lost style points for barely beating 2-5 Arizona, plus the same media who built them up the entire offseason has now abandoned them. I would be surprised if USC didn’t score 80 points and punch Charlie Weiss in the stomach before they left South Bend.
#10 California @ UCLA – All Cal had to do was beat mediocre Oregon State, and the number one spot would be theirs. I expect them to unleash the fury on the Bruins not seen in Southern California since OJ Simpson.

Half interesting:
Texas A&M @ Nebraska – Two coaches (Franchione and Callahan) with absolutely nothing to lose. These guys are just out here to beef up the resume.
#15 Kansas @ Colorado – This game will finally resemble a DIVISION ONE FOOTBALL GAME, BROTHER!!! (sorry, I’ll be using that one for a while)

SEC games:
#20 Tennessee @ Alabama – The only thing that keeps this game from turning into a riot every year (especially since Phil ratted out the Tide) is that most fans here are too drunk to fight. But this year, the game starts at 12:30. I can see the bottles flying now….
Vandy @ #6 South Carolina – Go ahead and try to convince yourself that this game could be close, but Spurrier hasn’t been able to run up a score since he’s been back in the SEC. This could be his chance.
Arkansas @ Ole Miss – Two crazy-ass coaches. Wasted talent on the field. The post game presser may actually be more interesting than this game.
#14 Florida @ #8 Kentucky – As a Georgia fan, you can only hope this game goes into about 6 or 7 overtimes and everyone is physically, emotionally and spiritually drained at the end.
#18 Auburn @ #5 LSU – Uh oh. The Auburn team everyone forgot about at the beginning of the year is BAAA-AAAACK. Remember when no one thought they could beat Florida? And remember how physical last year’s game was between these two teams? I was sore from just watching it.

Lost my giggawiggy!!!

The average person calls them flashdrives. And let’s face it; many of us have become very dependent on them because we store everything we know on there. If you don’t think you are overly reliant on a flashdrive, think about what would happen if you lost it. A-HA! More important than you thought, huh?
My wife is not what you would call techno-savvy. While I’m on the phone with others talking about gigabytes, drive speeds and other BASIC (yes, basic) tech terms, she rolls her eyes and says I sound like a nerd. Then she mocked me – “Hey, check out my new giggawiggy!” Hence the term.
AAAAAAAAaaaaand we’re back
I keep telling myself that I should put a password protect on my flashdrive, but nothing motivates me to do it. Well, I’m here to tell ya brother, losing it will. You become like a crack addict looking for a misplaced child. “Oh, baby, I’ll protect you, if I find you I won’t never let you get away again!!!!” FYI, I go on the same rampage when one of my kids loses the remote control. “No, no, no, please God, not the remote! I’m sorry I skipped church! I’m sorry I yelled at my wife! I’ll do anything if you just shine a light on my remote control!! You could swear that a chorus of angels begins to sing when you finally find it.
I begin thinking of all the horrible things that could be happening to my poor lost giggawiggy. Somebody could be putting it in their own computer, looking through and reading my files, checking out my personal info. Though really, if it was a cell phone, wouldn’t somebody do that so they could find out who it belongs to? Even worse, my giggawiggy could be sitting there, all alone, on the side of the street staring at the cars going by. That thought just keeps me up at night.
As it turns out, I forgot to take my flashdrive out of my pants pocket before tossing them in the hamper. Despite me not hearing the screams and cries from under a pile of clothes, I was able to eventually trace back my steps and find it – four hours after I lost it. Remember that scene from the Warner Bros cartoon? “I’m going to love him and pet him and squeeze him………”? Our reunion was reminiscent of that, and I’m not embarrassed. Now I just have to find a decent protection for muh BAY-BEE………..

May I help you?

You really thought I was going to write anything this week after the shellacking that the Dawgs took on Saturday?

Notsomuch.........

I Didn’t Make Predictions Week 5, And I Won’t for Week 6.

If I were a gambling man, I’d be broke. But I bet a lot of people lost money, seeing that 6 of the top 13 teams lost. Watching college football – good. Gambling on college football – bad. You already know who won and lost. I would consider it one of the best weekends ever. Florida, Oklahoma, Texas –all losers. But the celebrating and gloating is over.

Let’s look at what’s happening this weekend:

Florida @ LSU – Does anyone really think this game has lost its luster just because of Florida’s loss to Auburn? No, I didn’t think so. Sure Tim Tebow may have had to return his cape, but don’t think he’s not going to try to get it back.

Kentucky @ South Carolina – Is South Carolina for real? Is Kentucky for real? I know a lot of Gamecock fans who aren’t taking this game seriously. Big mistake. Big one.

Wisconsin @ Illinois – Two more teams trying to prove they are for real. In case you haven’t been paying attention, Ron Zook’s team is 4-1, with a win over Penn State. Wisconsin is also trying to play the “no one respects us” card.

Oklahoma @ Texas – This game HAS lost some luster. The Sooner lost to a Colorado team they had no business being close to, and the Longhorns loss was coming sooner or later. Still, it’s a grudge match and those are fun to watch…..sometimes.

West Virginia @ Syracuse – West Virginia’s motto, “Hey we’re still good without Pat White”. Syracuse’s motto, “We beat Louisville”. Boooooo-ring.

Virginia Tech @ Clemson – VT just hasn’t been VT this year. Clemson has been Clemson, meaning they start off well and then tank. Is this the week they start tanking?

Ohio State @ Perdue – Big Ten football. Yawn.

Georgia @ Tennessee – I could go on all day about this one. About how UT is desperate to prove they won’t repeat 2005. About how Georgia hasn’t lost in Neyland Stadium since 1999. About how UT laid 51 points on Georgia last year in Athens. About how Mark Richt resembles Bugs Bunny and Phil Fulmer resembles the Angry Bull. The Vols are 2.5 favorites, but for the life of me I can’t figure out why.

Other thoughts:

Does anyone think it’s funny that Florida safety and team captain Tony Joiner (last seen kissing Tim Tebow on the sidelines) was arrested for taking his girlfriend’s car from an impound at 4am? Is it even funnier that the owner of the impound, an admitted Gator fan, now says that the whole thing was a misunderstanding?

Former Colorado back up punter Mitch Cozad was sentenced to seven years for stabbing the starting punter. Didn’t Harding/Kerrigan/Gillooly teach us ANYTHING?

Nick Saban’s backhanded slam on South Florida’s academics is like Lou Holtz telling Rece Davis “I can’t understhtand you, you need to sthpeak more clearly”.