THE NEW PHONE BOOKS ARE IN!!!!!

Remember that scene from “The Jerk”, where marked gas pumper Steve Martin was waaaay too excited because he received a copy the new phone books and he was checking for his name? Something similar happened this week and a bunch of us ‘Steve Martins’ are excited (only none of our names are in THIS book). Not only was the 2007 UGA Spring Football Media Guide released, but so was the Spring Depth Chart. Not impressed? Fine, whatever. But this material will give guys like me HOURS and HOURS of debate fodder. What will the running game look like? Which linebackers will start and who will back them up? Who’s gonna pick up the slack and get called for all those penalties now that Daniel Inman is gone? (OK, that was cheap, but, come on. No one’s gonna miss him)

One note (yeah, just one after reviewing all that data). Last season’s loss to Kentucky in Lexington marked the first time since Mark Richt arrived that we have lost to an unranked team in their home stadium (#3 Auburn and #11 LSU are the only other two losses – please don’t bring up Florida). There are two candidates for that this year. Alabama and Tennessee. Let’s take Alabama first. After God sent his son, Nick Saban, down to earth to coach the Tide (can you tell I’m sick of hearing about him?), He decided he would let Little Nicky stand or fall on his own. So contrary to every Bama fan’s declaration that they have already won their 13^th National Championship in 2007, he hasn’t exactly started out with a bang in his first year (8-4, 6-5-1) at big time schools. And by using the term ‘big time school’, I’m excluding Toledo. Um, can Alabama beat us? Sure. Pat Dye probably still thinks we’re not ‘man enough’. But if Saban took over any team but Alabama, I would be worried. We win that one.

Tennessee. Every year I pick us to lose up there in Knoxville. And every year, we man-handle them on Rocky Top. How? Why? Hopefully, the Dawgs will remember that last year the Vols became only the second team EVER to score more than 50 points in Sanford Stadium. But QB Erik Ainge is a senior and is poised for a big year. I think this is the year we find out he doesn’t HAVE to have a pair of All SEC receivers to be good. That’s right, I’m picking the Vols to win.

What about Vandy you say? We play in Nashville this year. They hurt our pride. They ruined our Homecoming. I bet Coach Richt does everything but bring Hershel back to make sure we beat them. We don’t lose that one.

Ok, I have to get back to the media guide. There’s more raw data to review.

Post Football Blues

Post Football Blues:

For those of you who are going through sports withdrawal because:

1. You’re not even sure what channels show hockey games. Plus you can’t watch it without wanting to beat somebody’s ass.
2. You haven’t watched an NBA game since Pete Maravich stopped playing. You watched this year’s Allstar game until you saw Eva Longoria, then turned the channel.
3. You LOVE playing golf. You HATE watching it.
4. You love college football, but have had your absolute fill of the undeniable travesty that recruiting has become. (Hint: have you cursed a 17-year old kid because he signed with Notre Dame or Florida? Then yeah, you’ve had your fill)
5. You got your wife a Valentine’s Day present because there was nothing else going on that would cause you to forget.
6. You called in a talk radio show because they were having a discussion on whether or not Tom Brady was a bad guy for fathering a child out of wedlock.

Then I’m here to help………..

Let me qualify first by saying I’m not a huge NFL fan. I get excited about college football. But I watch the Atlanta Falcons if they’re on, and I’ll watch the playoffs. So even after college football is over, I have some football to watch. But some thing just happened that should make us all excited – the NCAA’s reversal of the clock rules. Most people don’t realize how important this is. Did you not realize just how fast the season went? Were you like me, looking at your calendar on November 11^th saying, “Man, where did the TIME go?” (well, for Bulldog fans, we didn’t want the season to end because of the momentum. The Dawgs played like a high school JV team for most of October, but turned it around to end the season with three straight wins over Top 25 teams). Because they wanted to speed up the game, what the NCAA rules committee ended up doing was cutting the game and leaving the same amount of commercials. Don’t get me wrong. I love those ESPN Gameday commercials, just not at the expense of seeing field action. More football = a good thing. Do I understand that commercials are necessary to offset the cost of programming? Sure. But do I believe that anyone besides network officials were complaining about the games running too long? Huh-uh. If a network nimrod thinks that any of us actually watches a shortened version of news or “Everybody Loves Raymond” immediately after the SEC Game of the Week telecast, they need to do more research. We’re flipping the channel to Sportscenter to watch the VERY highlights of the game we just saw AND looking to see what teams above us got beat so we can jump up in the rankings. So, in essence, we’re just watching more football, wherever it may be. Try to end the telecast too soon and I’ll just flip over to TBS and watch PAC 10 football if I have to.

More football. It’s all about more football. Don’t forget it.

Homophobia Gone Mad

There’s not much I can add to what Tim Hardaway said about homosexuality (when asked about former NBA player John Amaechi coming out as a gay man in the NBA). It’s been argued and argued and there’s not much chance that people will change their stance on this issue. Of course what separates this from other conversations about homosexuality is that Hardaway used the word “hate”. “I hate homosexuals” he said. He went on to say that he would avoid a gay man if he were a teammate, especially in the locker room. To me, this sums up the whole issue. Most people who believe homosexuality is wrong will point to this very argument. “Would you want a gay man in YOUR locker room, staring at you while you get undressed?” I would venture to say that most guys who could care less about someone’s sexual preference would not want to share a public shower or locker room with someone who is gay. Fair enough.

(I must add that I’ve played pick up basketball on a regular basis with a former women’s D1 player and while she is very pretty, the attraction gets lost when she’s schooling me in the lane for rebounds or stealing the ball from me).

So to follow up with the next topic, many are asked what would happen if a CURRENT NBA player admitted he was gay. Would his teammates accept him? Would they treat him with any respect?

I have a different angle. I think a gay player COULD be successful, as long as he uses it to his advantage. Like or not (and I HATE it), trash talking is a part of today’s sports culture. And out on the court, NONE of those NBA players are quiet. Imagine how a player who is gay could get under the skin of an opponent. Basketball is a VERY physical sport – body checking, elbows flying, blocking out for rebounds. Would YOU be able to concentrate if a gay player was taunting you and making you uncomfortable?

“Tough shot, sexy”

“Ooooh, you sure missed that one, sweetie”

“Honey, if you can get by me, you can HAVE the basket, but I aint’ gonna make it easy”

“I’m taking this to the basket, if you want to touch me on the way, be my guest”

“If I score 20 points tonight can I call you my bitch?”

The testosterone that it takes to play pro sports is high volume. It’s doubtful that comments like these wouldn’t make a macho player’s skin crawl, thus throwing off his game. In fact, chances are that it would make most guys go crazy and draw a few technical fouls. And of course, two of those and you’re out of the game. Football, baseball, this principle could apply in any sport.

There is the argument that teammates of a gay player would be really uncomfortable with that kind of talk. Please. Did Terrell Owens’ teammates put up with him as long as he was scoring touchdowns? Did the Atlanta Braves deal with John Rocker when he was saving all those games? Barry Bonds? Dennis Rodman? The answer is yes. I’m not saying that Joe Macho wouldn’t have some reservations about sharing a locker space with a gay teammate. But most heterosexual men make the mistake of assuming that all gay men are checking them out. Stop flattering yourself. I just don’t think that’s true. I don’t think that homosexual men are any more ‘sex hungry’ than heteros. The notion that a gay man in a locker room is a kid in a candy store who doesn’t know where to begin is ludicrous.

The simple fact is that homosexuality is here to stay. I truly believe that people are born gay. That seems to be the main sticking point in whether or not someone accepts homosexuality. But remember this, if it DOES bother you that someone is gay, or wants to have a gay relationship (or get married), chances are that you think of them as a gay first. Just as many still think of some people as black first. It’s the first thing you think about when you deal with them. And you already have all of your preconceived notions up and running that could get in the way of your relationship with them. Notions that they could, in fact, use against you.

Are you a cynic? Then think of it the way Dennis Miller did. “Why despise someone on the basis of color or sexual orientation when, if you take the time to get to know them, you can find SO many other reasons to hate them?”