Double backlash

Please understand that I know I’m petty. I know that I think things I shouldn’t, but here’s the deal. So do you. Yes, you do.

I’m ready for double backlash. Backlash has passed us by, and I’m tired of it. A backlasher is someone who antagonizes popular notions, people and hotbed stories by degrading them. You know the guy I’m talking about. He buys the newest form of technology as soon as it’s available, then when the next generation comes out he’s trashing the first thing he bought. He points out how bad the #1 song on the Billboard chart is. He wants you to understand just how hip he is, how anti-culture he is. He should have a t-shirt that says, “Please listen to me, I’m lonely.”
Understand that this is not an indictment of someone who doesn’t like everything popular, but of those who go out of their way to ruin it for everyone else.

Examples of backlash:
Hating the hot new TV show (Friends, Desperate Housewives, etc)
Parents hating that their kids love Barney
Making fun of Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, or any cute pop singer
Complaining about Mexicans taking all of our jobs in the US
Stating that you knew Lance Bass of NSync was gay
Repeating the story you heard about a guy who bought some groceries with food stamps and then got into his brand new Mercedes Benz.
Shouting above the music that Van Halen was better with David Lee Roth
People who complain about children in restaurants and airplanes.
White, male Christians who are “persecuted”.

You know what the problem is? Backlash people generally have more than a few mean bones in their body. Nice people don’t spend time on double backlash. I’d like to be that spokesperson.

So here’s a few things I’D like to see:
Barney pimp-slapping a soccer mom and leaving a dent in her minivan.
Britney Spears telling Kid Rock “You know what? You’re right. I lip sync cutesy pop songs and you’re ugly. But I can always write different songs, you skank”
Someone using food stamps at the grocery store, then turning around to everyone who was staring at them in line to say, “Don’t worry. I’m walking home, bitch!”
A three year old taking a dump on the lap top of the business traveler who insists on taking up three chairs at the Airport.

That’s double backlash and I’m ready for it.