hat the league generates. For what seems like six years now, Carmelo Anthony of the Denver Nuggets has been waiting to be traded. He's had his own by-line on ESPN's "bottom line" ticker since the start of the season. I'm not sure we gave this much attention to Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez. Lucky for us, it's all over. He was traded to the Knicks in a 3-team deal. I think this is how it shakes out:
Knicks get: Carmelo Anthony, Chauncey Billups, Shelden Williams, Anthony Carter, Renaldo Balkman, Kurt Rambis, Kermit Washington, Spud Webb, an assistant coach to be named later, a trainer, two extra posse members for Amare Stoudemire, a Pepsi Center ticket taker, three parking lot attendants, a director of Sales/Marketing, and a lower level popcorn vendor with a meth problem.
Nuggets get: Wilson Chandler, Raymond Felton, Danilo Gallinari, Timofey Mozgov, Corey Brewer, $3 miilion in cash, Steve Kerr, Chris Webber, Marv Albert's stilettos from the "biting incident", a 2014 first round draft pick, two 2014 second round picks, a 2021 second round draft pick, reminders in 2013 and 2020 that they have those picks, a security guard fresh out of Alcoholics Anonymous, an A/V nerd, four cheerleaders, two pictures of Bill Bradley in tight shorts, a book containing Isiah Thomas' greatest pick up lines, and a concession stand training DVD ("Beer Doesn't Pour Itself").
Timberwolves get: Anthony Randolph, Eddie Curry, and a book titled, "How To Pick Up And Move On When You've Been Screwed In An NBA Trade"
I've only been watching Sportscenter for 15 minutes this morning and I'm already sick of it. Sports Media is SO in love with this deal. Why? Because it might make the Knicks relevant again. And nothing is so important in this world as to have the teams in New York and Los Angeles be relevant. God forbid other teams be the center of attention for one entire season.
The NBA really sucks.
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